I just read about an incredibly cruel practice taking place in South Carolina. I am an animal rights activist and and have always been an animal lover. I have never felt more empathy for animals as I do now. There is a practice called “Bear bays” where a bear is tethered to the ground. They have their teeth and claws removed so they are completely defenseless. In the picture, the bear is inside a fenced areas with a section of boards behind her. A group of bored looking men stood around the edge of the fencing, looking on with their hands stuffed in their pockets. In groups of 3-4, hunting dogs are unleashed and allowed to attack the bear. She is terrified and confused, backed up against the boards, foaming at the mouth and trying to cover her face. This goes on for hours as group after group of dogs is allowed to attack her, tearing her flesh. She is trapped and completely defenseless.
Being a TI is like being this bear. It is more emotional pain and abuse, but the trauma is just as real. As a TI you are trapped and completely defenseless, just like the bear. You are stripped of all your defenses, all your rights. You have no one to turn to for help. Your attacks take place in broad daylight, with nothing but complicit, expressionless onlookers as witnesses. No lawyer, doctor, friend, family member, neighbor,coworker, therapist, police officer, deputy, or politician is going to help. And these people may in fact be in the audience. You do not have a single ally left in the world, the perps made certain of this beforehand. You are alone with the devil, without a single witness or ally, without any protection.
The torture is relentless, and just like the bear the TI will desperately try to protect herself. You may still be able to hiss and roar at them and they will back off a little, intimidated. But a fresh group of attackers will be along within minutes to rip away at you some more, over and over again.
TI’s may not necessarily have a lot of physical pain from their torture but I think their reaction to their trauma and injuries are still very similar to the bear’s. This bear is alive and watching things being done to her body that she knows no one will ever be able to fix. She may see a limb coming off or internal organs falling out. These wounds are beyond repair and she has a sudden realization she will never heal from this abuse. She knows her body will never function normally again. This is a subconscious realization that induces immediate horror and panic. It is terrorism. In the same way the TI knows that their mind will never be the same, will never function the same way again. Her life and mind have been damaged beyond repair, her attackers have made it impossible to fix. They will never be able to trust that someone is not a “perp”, whose goal is to humiliate and isolate them, reducing them to an empty shell of their former selves. Life has become a mine field of unpredictability and pain with no safety net.
I thought about what would happen if one of the men in the picture decided to save the bear from the dogs. And it reminded of me of the “double bind” aspect of satanic ritual abuse. After being attacked by these dogs for hours, this bear is going to be dead or in so much pain that she wishes she were dead. If someone tries to save her, what good is it? She is damaged goods from the start, what quality of life would she have? In Satanic Ritual abuse, young kids are exposed to the “double bind” tactic. The adult will torture an animal in front of them and tell the child they have 2 choices. The child can either continue to watch the animal be tortured or go ahead and kill the animal themselves and put the animal out of it’s misery. It’s the adult’s way of indoctrinating the kids into ritual abuse. Neither option is good or right and child’s mind will become fucked six ways to Sunday because of that. It’s possible that there is also a double bind aspect to the torture of TI’s. I think that’s how the perp “puppet masters” light a fire under their minion’s asses. The perps can either sit and watch us flounder and struggle daily in this tortured life, already too permanently damaged to live normally…or they can take part in actively pushing us closer and closer to the edge, expediting our elimination so they no longer have to witness our misery and pain. We are a ball and chain to them while alive.
Take heart, TI’s. Why do you think they picked a bear for this torture and not a field mouse or a sheep? Because like the bear, we are seen as a threat. We are someone to be feared because of our strength, ferocity, loyalty, and effectiveness. We are resourceful and self- sufficient. When we are not stripped of our defenses and rights, we can take them down with one hand tied behind our back. When we roll with our crew and outnumber them, they are scared SHITLESS. It is sheer cowardice and their own self-hatred and complete lack of virility that makes groups of them target us for entertainment.