I just walked home from yoga class. As I approached my front steps, a blue VW Eurovan pulled out in the driveway in front of me, paused, made a left, turned into the driveway behind me, passed under my building, passed me again through a courtyard, and entered a garage next to my building. It’s not illegal to move your car, it is illegal to conspire with a group of neighbors to harass, intimidate, and stalk someone in sync. This neighbor has participated in it before.

In a way perps want to desensitize the target to the abuse. For us to expect and accept the daily harassment, invasion of privacy, neural monitoring, break-ins, stalking, noise campaign, street theater, rudeness, and blocking. To come to think of their crime as “just a joke” like they do. To forget how completely heinous and abusive it is, and what a complete violation of human and civil rights it is to make another human a victim of a life long non-consensual experiment. In their eyes, the target has 2 options, either accept it as your way of life for the rest of your life i.e. suck their dick; or you can end it by committing suicide.

I want a new primary doctor and will be requesting soon. The one I have is a fraud and an impersonator. He  actually sat and smirked at me while telling me he knew my psych diagnosis. The problem is, I was never diagnosed before I last saw him. The discharge diagnosis was “rule out ____”. He is a liar and a fraud. As far as finding another OB/GYN doctor, I’m at a loss. These appt.’s always suck to begin with, and my last 3 at Kaiser were just weird. They were with 3 different doctors and I now realize how weird and perp-like they were.

The first one was very young, Asian, and inexperienced. Actually I think she was a Nurse Practitioner. It felt like it was her first day on the job. When we finished I heard her rush into and office next door, I got the impression she was about to break down and cry. Probably over guilt at impersonating an NP. The second one was a male. He looked more like a contractor or a construction worker than a doctor, he didn’t wear a lab coat. He told me I had a cyst on my ovary that might need to be removed. When I came back for an Ultrasound (with a machine that looked and felt outdated), it had “magically” disappeared. He told me he was retiring soon and gave me 2 other names. I made an appt. with one who had an Asian name. She turned out to be a white female. I was 39 at the time. The first thing she said to me when she walked in the room was, “So, do you still get your period?” I actually saw her make a face when she took her hand out of me. Her laid back attitude struck me as odd, like she had just walked in off the street. I now realize she probably did. And for all I know, all of my MD appt.’s are probably recorded for my perps viewing pleasure. Yes America, they really, really, really are that sick.

Some other weird doctor stories:

A dermatologist I had seen a couple of times at Kaiser looked completely different when I came back to see him about a year later. I mean this wasn’t even a look-alike, it was not even him. Maybe I should have confirmed his name, but that’s where they nail you for acting unstable. I am very conscious of checking ID tags now.

I saw a doctor in Washington DC for a physical in 1995 or 1996. He looked like Richard Belzer, the comedian/actor from Law & Order. I remember him making me stand up and open my gown while he stood behind me. He then told me I needed to lose 10 pounds. Years later, around 2000, I now realize the same doctor wheeled my dad back to his unit on a gurney after having a heart catheterization at St. Raphael’s hospital in New Haven, CT. I distinctly remember seeing him and another doctor through a glass window. He was tall with a longish hair parted in the middle and wide, tinted eyeglasses. My Dad reported he had a very sharp, sudden pain in his chest during the procedure that he wasn’t expecting. He later told me that a nurse left the blood pressure cuff on the monitor in his room go on and off all night. I know now my Dad and family were being targeted at this time.

And don’t even get me started on the inpatient doctors when I was admitted to a locked unit last summer after being mobbed at work and violently jumped by 2 cops. Everyone in the Emergency dept. and the locked unit was a complete perp fraud, from the patients to the doctors. My ER doctor and my attending doctor both stalked me once separately in public after my discharge.