I Eat Boogers.

In your head, in your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie,
Hey, hey, hey. What’s in your head,
In your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie?   – The Cranberries

Wow, I said it, how liberating. I feel like I am maturing and regressing at the exact same time. I also can’t believe I am having to write a post about something so incredibly infantile.

Perps want targets to feel deeply ashamed and disgusted by themselves. If you have a nasty habit and they mimic it back to you everywhere you go, you have no one to blame but yourself, right? Because you are the one who does this nasty thing in private. And if you didn’t do this nasty thing they wouldn’t be mimicking back to you in the first place. So we have shame, anger, guilt, disgust, humiliation, degradation, alienation, isolation, and self-loathing all packed into one punch. It’s not a joke, this same exact tactic was used by a foreign country to effectively break down American POW’s.

When a target commits a violent act and no one ever finds out why they did it, it is because they are too ashamed to say why. Ashamed of themselves and their own compulsive habits. Ashamed that they could become violent over such infantile behavior. Ashamed that their every thought, motivation, and flaw has been laid out on display for thousands of perps. If more targets would come out in the open with what their perps are really doing to them, the severe degree of cruelty and torture perps inflict would be better exposed.

But it is tough. The things perps mimic/repeat can be deeply embarrassing to TI’s and that is why perps do it. And to try to relate these things to other people is even more humiliating, and the perps know this. But TI’s have to bite the bullet and push through it. It is severe psychological abuse and needs to be exposed.

These are some things my perps mimic constantly that are deeply humiliating to me:

I pick my nose and eat it.

I fart a lot and loudly.

I rub lotion onto my breasts and thighs after I shower.

When I masturbate, I sometimes touch my breasts and jiggle them up and down.

I snack constantly at home. I overeat and I inhale my food. I rarely use a napkin.

I flush the toilet right before I urinate to hide the sound from my neighbors.

I sometimes get urine on the floor/bathroom rug because of this, causing an odor.

I don’t flush the toilet again after I go so the bowl often has paper/ urine left in it.

I read while I am on the toilet. I look at the Victoria’s Secret Catalog a lot.

When they were causing me to have severe constipation last spring, I would sometimes inspect my stools with a Q-tip.

At home, when the weather is warm, I wear white “wife beater” tank tops with no bra.

I frequently crack the knuckles in my hands.

I frequently pick at skin on the sides of my face, forehead, and upper back/shoulders.

I have hair around my nipples.

When my hair is dirty my scalp itches, when I scratch it I get dandruff under my fingernails. I have to scrape it out with another nail.

I’m not a good housekeeper.

I wear a pair of red fleece Christmas themed pajama pants throughout the year when I am cold.

I frequently spray saliva when I talk.

I save empty cardboard boxes in my storage unit.

I don’t always use the most appropriate word to describe something.

I lost so much weight from stress when my stalking went overt, my bras no longer fit and the straps kept falling down. Women would mimick me pulling up my bra straps. One elderly woman even did it at a traffic light. She was so theatrical about it she reminded me of a mime.

In addition to the above, they also have knowledge of when I have my periods and when I shave my genital area. They have made comments/innuendo about it in therapy and during classes.

Thousands of perps already know this information about me because I have been under illegal surveillance inside my home 24/7/365. Scrutinized to the extreme where “nothing is unimportant”. These behaviors have been mimicked repeatedly back to me physically, verbally, and non-verbally non-stop over the past 11 months by men, women, and children. By cops, attorneys, therapists, neighbors, city officials/employees, perps in group therapy, perps posing as TI’s, coworkers, at Church, at yoga, at traffic court, at City Council meetings, at the beach, at the market, at salons, at the vet, at restaurants, in classes, at bars, online, on the phone, in traffic, by complete strangers on the streets. It is the perps’ way of making the target feel freshly raped and assaulted each and every day, all day.

I am not proud of these habits, some of them are compulsive and I have no control over them. They are disgusting to me too and I still can’t believe that everywhere I go right now people are acting them out in front of me. When a target reveals these things they take the risk of feeling even more vulnerable and exposed, when we are already so raw from abuse. But I think it’s important that we reveal all the ugliness and bring it out into the light. None of these things I do are illegal or deviant, but they are socially unacceptable. That’s why they occur at home, not in public. I know I am not the only one who does these things, but our perception becomes extremely distorted as they are magnified and amplified by the perps. Up until last summer, I thought I was doing these things in the privacy of my own home. Before I found out I actually had an audience and my home was now a “fishbowl”.

So judge away, everyone. I may be a sweat hog but at least I am a nice/attractive one, who is really a good person. At least I’m not a toxic fucking mess and a zombie jihadist Nazi serial killer imbecile/sadistic psychopath, orgasming with a red white and blue DHS dildo up my ass.

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The Asshole Apocalypse…A Day in the Life

8:30 am  Put items outside door to donate for a VVA pickup today. Every time I open the door and go outside a loud power tool comes on at the house across the street. There has been a remodeling project going on there for over 2 months now. Loud cars/ trucks/motorcycles/commercial vehicles continue to drive up and down my street periodically as they have done for the past 10 months. Continue to get occasional air harassment/direct overhead flights at home and out in the community (choppers/small planes).

9:30 am Walk up hill to laundry room. Loud voices coming from rooftop patio over laundry room- one them is a HOA board member. They push furniture around loudly across the floor while I am in the laudry room. A female neighbor comes in and uses the washers right next to mine even though there are 5-6 other washers to choose from. I move my detergent bottle out of her reach because they are always looking for an opportunity. Noise campaign, synchronized harassment, stalking harassment, crowding harassment.

10:15 am Leave for Sheriff’s station. Synchronized vehicle/stalking harassment (aka “car ballet”) in front of my home. Tan car pulls up and idles in the crosswalk right before I pull out. Another car pulls up and idles next to it. Large truck idling in intersection, backs into a parking spot on the street.

10:30 am Sheriff’s dept. to report another stolen cell phone. Blocking and stalking harassment inside the station. Gesture harassment by staff (pointing), color coordinated harassment- clothing. A man enters and paces back and forth continuously. Another one does coughing harassment.

11:00 am  FedEx store. Vehicle harassment in the parking lot by a car with “handicapped” plates (I aasume it’s a mental handicap). Blocking harassment by a perp inside the store (dressed in bright green) when I try to get help. Color coordinated harassment- clothing.

11:30 am CVS.

11:45 am Smart & Final. A group of firemen stand near the entrance as I approach. Its obvious there’s a skit planned. They enter ahead of me and disperse inside the store, passing me multiple times while I shop. Stalking harassment, first Responder harassment. Color coordinated harassment in the store as usual- clothing.

12:00 pm  Arrive home, landscapers blocking my parking spot with large pile of branches. They have also blocked my front steps with a large bundle of branches. A lot of dust and dirt in the air, causing me to cough. Cab pulls up and drops of a neighbor in front of his house. Stalking harassment, blocking harassment, synchronized harassment, environmental harassment. Have you noticed how everyone from the grocery bagger to the bike messenger to the landscaper, etc. wears the little bright green or yellow safety vests now?

1:00 pm Go to pickup laundry, large bundle of branches still blocking my stairs. A neighbor talks loudly on the phone out on her balcony as I exit the laundry room. When I return from the laundry room one of the HOA board members is standing at the bottom of my stairs. He lives on the other side of the complex. I have to walk in between him and the bundle to pass. He just stands there and looks at me for no reason and tries to engage me in conversation. If you act like you don’t want to talk to them (because you know they are involved in Cointelpro/ criminal conspiracy), they will use it against you later. “I said hello and she just walked right by me.” Stalking harassment, synchronized harassment, crowding harassment, blocking harassment.

3:30 pm Sounds from inside my ceiling while I am using my bathroom, sounds like a person moving around.

4:00 pm Sounds from inside by bedroom ceiling, same thing.

5:10 pm Sudden, loud crashing sound coming from the other side of my bedroom wall while resting in my bed. Came from the apt. below or next to me.

6:00 pm Walk to Italian class, noise/ vehicle harassment, gesture harassment/ mimicking harassment from drivers.

7:00 pm Italian class- gesture harassment (pointing), mimicking, color coordinated harassment (clothing). PDA. Woman sitting next to me continuosly twirling ankle and moving both legs up and down while we watch a video, anything to catch your eye and distract/annoy you.

8:45 pm Walk home from class. Mexican male walking on opposite side of the street starts coughing. He then crosses the street and starts walking directly towards me. He had a black hoodie pulled over his head. I did not like this at all and told him to get away from me. He did not speak English or acted like he didn’t. I said some other choice words to him and walked ahead.

9:20 pm  Arrive at home, neighbor from next building out in the parking lot taking things out of car, acting like she just arrived too. She has actually been synchronizing this for years when I come and go, I just realized this summer it is stalking harassment. She once followed to me a grocery store after 10pm, when I came out she was standing there with a petition for people to sign. There was no one else around. She said it was to protect our property from eminent domain. I am now wondering wtf I actually signed.

When you are a TI, be prepared to have multiple “inhuman” moments throughout the day. The reason for this is because the people who are abusing you are not human. They are not men. They are not women. Just as there are no laws yet to protect TI’s and bring perps to justice, there are no words yet to describe these beings. They are not animals, because that term is way too good for them. I don’t know the words to describe them yet. I have wasted a lot of time trying though. And after 10 months of trying I’m here to say please don’t waste a second of your time. THEY ARE JUST NOT WORTH IT. Change the channel, meditate, pray, go about your business, have faith, think positive/beautiful thoughts, and focus on activism, opposing, and exposing Organized Cointelpro style gang stalking.

I watched ‘The Talented Mr. Ripley’ last night and it’s so true that a fraud only gets away with things for so long. These people have tortured my Mom, my Dad, my sisters, brothers, nieces, nephews, cousins, and friends and they have absolutely no remorse or guilt about it. They actually get drunk/high off it. They work themselves up into a frenzy and masturbate to it while rabidly foaming at the mouth. The harassment becomes a compulsion and addiction, like a little child’s constant plea for attention. So when they continue to pass me in the produce aisle with their hands in their pockets and a smirk on their face, we know at least one word for them: insane.